Less fabuloUS in the kitchen

I realize everyone’s moved on from Thanksgiving and all that, but I have a bit of a bone to pick, still, from the run-up to that holiday.

The problem is that to pick that bone, I’m going to have to admit something.

Yes, people, it’s true. I have a subscription to US Weekly. It’s a short subscription, one that I’m pretty sure I got through some deal from Amazon.com or MyCokeRewards.com or something, and it has nothing to do with how interested I am in the dirt behind the Tiger Woods sex scandal, because I really prefer much more high-minded reading. You know, like Rachael Ray.

Anyway, it’s coming to the house, which means I have to read through it. I mean, I have to, because it arrives, EVERY WEEK, and how is anyone supposed to resist that onslaught of Stars—They’re Just Like Us!? No one is supposed to resist that. That is the only correct answer here.

So, the issue before Thanksgiving featured some celebrity recipe ideas, most of which actually made sense in context of the holiday. The First Family’s White House Whipped Sweet Potatoes was the kind of recipe that could be sourced at a local farmers’ market and that was actually seasonal. I’m not a fan of Jon Gosselin, but his Apple Crisp recipe certainly seemed easy and festive. And Lauren Conrad’s Stuffing, well, it didn’t break any new grounds, but it was loaded with vegetables and dried fruit.

But Kristin Chenoweth, your contribution was Broiled Asparagus? Really? Asparagus, olive oil, salt and pepper, “Transfer to a platter and voilá!” Yes, voilá indeed, Kristin. Way to bring something totally unseasonal to the holiday table. And US Magazine, stick to what you do best: scandal and rating of fashion. You are so much less fabuloUS in the kitchen.